Have you ever found yourself lost in a conversation, unsure of what the other person was trying to say? This is where the power of clarity comes into play.
In a recent conversation with a mental health professional, she and I discussed the people-pleasing tendency that so many of us struggle with. She mentioned that people pleasers are often the hardest kinds of individuals for others to trust. This was alarming to me as a recovering people pleaser. Reflecting on my adolescent years, I realized that engaging in ambiguity to avoid being direct was a misguided effort to be kind.
As I’ve grown older, I’ve learned that my ambiguity left too much to interpretation and placed undue pressure on others. My efforts to be “easy” and “pleasing” were foiled by a lack of ownership over my expectations, hopes, and ideals, ultimately impacting those around me.
Was it easy to change my people-pleasing ways? Absolutely not, but I started small. I began by being clear with my expectations in just one situation each day. This clarity felt generous—to my loved ones and to my students.
In a professional development conversation discussing the work of Jody Carrington, her concept of “clear is kind” resonated deeply with me. As I rerouted my neural pathways and adjusted my approach to interactions, I began to wonder how this concept could relate to the world of education. Are we being clear? Are we being kind?
The Importance of Clarity in Education
Ambiguity often stems from a desire not to ruffle feathers or seem overly controlling. However, it is the ambiguity that can be unkind, leaving too much unknown and placing the burden of interpretation on others. When we are clear, we offer a generous understanding of our expectations.
In education, sometimes we provide too many options or leave instructions vague because we don’t want to seem overbearing. But it is in clarity that we find freedom and understanding. When we are clear with our expectations, we show respect for other people’s time and abilities. Clear communication reduces misunderstandings, increases efficiency, and fosters stronger relationships. It builds trust and demonstrates integrity, even though it is not always the easiest route.
Practical Strategies for Clear Communication
How can we, as educators, ensure that our expectations are communicated effectively? Here are some practical strategies:
- Use Clear Language: Take time to evaluate and simplify the language used in assignments and instructions.
- Provide Context: Offer the big picture or the background of a task or topic so students can fully understand what they are learning.
- Check for Understanding: Use formative assessments or ask students to paraphrase instructions back to you.
- Practice Active Listening: Listen graciously and with an open mind to students’ feedback and concerns to ensure they comprehend the material. Do not take feedback as a personal attack.
We often assume that being clear might come off as harsh or unkind, but this is a misconception. Clear communication is about respect and efficiency. It is crucial to balance clarity with politeness and respect, ensuring that our directness does not come across as insensitive.
Remember the golden rule: Are we treating others how we want to be treated? Are we assuming the best of the other person? Are we taking ownership of our expectations and how we communicate them?
Practice clear communication today. It is generous; it is kind. Clear is kind.
Author
Sara de Zwaan
Sara, MEd from UBCO, is currently teaching grades 6/7 at West Coast Adventist School as well as grades 7-9 at Kelowna Christian School. She has taught middle school since 2012 and loves getting to know each of her students.